How to Confront Your Roommate About a Problem

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    • 1). Ask to talk when your roommate is in a good mood. If she's angry or annoyed about something else, such as frustrations with school, your confrontation could make her angrier.

    • 2). Present the problem in a friendly manner. Don't call your roommate a name or use angry or insulting words. Instead of saying, "You taking an hour to get ready in the bathroom royally screws up my morning," say, "When you take an hour in the bathroom, it sometimes makes me late for things."

    • 3). Suggest a possible change, but be open to compromise. Your roommate might get angry if you act like he must do things your way or you'll complain. Rather, negotiate so that everyone is happy: "I don't mind if you have friends over on Friday nights, but could you please keep it relatively quiet after midnight?"

    • 4). Agree on some basic rules for living together. This is often called a "roommate agreement." Ideally this is done when you first begin living with someone. Setting rules, such as who does what chores and how late loud music can be played, will help avoid conflict later on.

    • 5). Thank your roommate for having the discussion about the problem and working toward a compromise. Maintain a healthy relationship with communication, and fewer problems will happen. Also, as you and your roommate communicate more, discussing and solving your problems will become easier.

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