You are making every effort you can to save your marriage.
However, why is it nothing you try seems to work? Do not worry because you are not alone.
It can be well meaning bad advice or an emotion reaction but lots of couples end up making mistakes that just push their spouse farther away.
You need to have a clear idea of where you are going wrong before you have any chance of repairing and healing your broken marriage.
Mistake 1 - You jump to conclusions! We tend to take our spouse for granted.
You assume that just because you have been married for a few years, you can read your spouse mind like a book.
Your spouse is a human being with own feelings and way of thinking.
Have you ever thought that maybe all these years, your spouse has been burying their emotions? Mistake 2 - Badgering and pressuring your spouse! It is human nature to feel stressed the moment you know your marriage is in trouble.
Due to this stress and desperation, we tend to blame, threaten or make our spouse feel guilty.
Begging is one of the most common forms of pressure.
You plead, you tell your spouse you cannot live without them, you cry or remind them that they are destroying the childrens' lives.
All these are the same as an emotional blackmail and it rarely help matters.
Talking to marriage counselor is a good way to start.
Sadly, most of us pressure and push our spouse to go for counseling.
Instead, encourage your spouse and let them decide only when they are ready.
Mistake 3 - You are dishonest! Never lie to each other.
When you lie, you are unable to have an emotional intimacy with your spouse.
It can drive a wedge in your marriage if you hide facts about important events that affect your life in the past, your true feelings or even your financial details.
Anything that has a direct effect on your marriage, I highly suggest you have an open communication with your spouse and let them know.
Mistake 4 - You apologize too much! It is not wrong to apologize for your mistakes and promising not to repeat them.
However, only apologize for mistakes you made.
Otherwise, you may sound insincere and can also come across as mocking.
It will also make you look desperate, which at this present time is hardly an attractive attribute.
You admit accepting half of the responsibility of the problems caused in the marriage.
You admit that you have issues that you and your spouse need to work out.
Do remember; never take more than your fair share of the blame.
It does not solve anything.
A marriage is never about one person only.
Mistake 5 - You hope and you wait! You are so afraid to rock the boat that you prefer to wait and hope.
If you wait and hope that your marriage problems will work themselves out eventually, you are living a fantasy.
It will definitely cause you and your partner to grow farther apart.
The resentment towards each other will only deepen.
There are no marriage problems that happen by themselves and neither will these problems be solved if you do nothing.
If you want to save your marriage from divorce, you and your spouse need to talk and take immediate and concrete action now! If you have been telling yourself "I want to save my marriage!" for too often, there is a very high possibility you are making some or even all of the mistakes above.
Do not despair because most couples on the verge of divorce are guilty of making the same mistakes.
Now that you know what those mistakes are, it is time you set things right.
Go save your marriage!