"Some experts are saying the Iranian election was rigged because in some towns, voter turnout was more than 100%. What's even stranger, all those extra votes were from elderly Jewish people in Palm Beach, Florida." --Conan O'Brien

"But the supreme leader said that the Iranian elections were not rigged. Well, that's good enough for me." --David Letterman

"But the Iranian government is planning a curfew because things are getting so crazy in Iran.

And I thought if there is one thing an angry mob respects, by God, it's a curfew, isn't it?" --David Letterman

"Ahmadinejad has declared himself the winner of the election and is planning his inauguration. And I said, 'Well, why not? The country is really in a party mood. Let's go. Let's get those plans in order. Let's have some fun.'" --David Letterman

"The leader of Iran's opposition party, Mousavi, the guy who apparently lost in the election, says he's ready to become a martyr. Don't kid yourselves. It's tough being a martyr nowadays, really. I mean, with the economy and all the budget cuts. When you die now, because of the economy, you're only going to be greeted by 35, maybe 40 virgins, tops." --David Letterman

"The Supreme Leader, Ayatollah Khomeini, said this election was not rigged, the results are final, and you can protest all you want, but if you keep doing it, we're going to start cracking heads. Now if we could only get this guy to call Norm Coleman." --Bill Maher

"You folks following the Iranian elections?

Well, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is the winner. And lots of protests. And it got to be so crazy that Iran's supreme leader actually spoke live on television last night. And it preempted Al Jazeera's most popular show, their number one show over there, which is 'How I Met Your Camel.'" --David Letterman

"Have you been following what's going on in Iran? Oh, it's crazy. They had the election. Now it looks like there was some monkey business going on. And now people are demonstrating in the streets. And the government has imposed a curfew, in Iran. I was thinking, whoa, I just hope this doesn't ruin the swinging Iranian night life." --David Letterman

"More unrest in Iran as the government continues to crack down on protesters. And to disperse crowds, Iranian police used tear gas, water cannons and the NBC primetime lineup." --Conan O'Brien

"No, it's sad about Iran, but what do you expect about a country with a government that's propped up by oil, that's led by a religious wacko? Kind of like Alaska." --Bill Maher

"The silver lining in this dark cloud is that Twitter found a reason to exist. Don't you know that this could be the first revolution brought to you by Twitter? Because that's how people are communicating to go of the rallies and so forth, and show the pictures of what's going on. Authorities, of course, in Iran shut down cell phone networks. They shut down the internet. Calls are absolutely not getting through or they're dropped immediately. Or as T-Mobile calls it, normal service." --Bill Maher

"Today, Iran's Supreme Leader, Ayatollah Ali Khomeini, said there's no fraud in the election, and the results will stand. That was the word from the supreme leader. I don't know, I wouldn't mind a second opinion from the other supreme leaders: Burrito Supreme, Taco Supreme, and of course, Diana Ross." --Jimmy Fallon

"But this guy, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, I mean, he claims victory and he is very unpopular. And the danger politically of this, he could ruin the political career of his brother, Jeb Ahmadinejad." --David Letterman

"Well, here's more big news going on in Iran. You folks been following the Iranian elections? Well, here it is. It's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and his opponent, Mir Hussein Moussavi. And they had one of those friendly bets. If Ahmadinejad wins the election, he gets a crate of figs, see. If Moussavi wins the election, he gets brutally slain." --David Letterman

"Here's the breakdown of the Iranian election: 63 percent of the vote for Ahmadinejad; Moussavi, he's got 34 percent of the vote; and 3 percent of the vote goes to Ralph Nader." --David Letterman

"Some massive protests continued today in Iran. Hundreds of thousands of people swarmed the streets to protest what they believe was election fraud in the re-election of President Mahmoud A Members Only Jacket." --Jimmy Kimmel

"People are suspecting that Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad's re-election may have been a sham because he's claiming he won by a 2-1 margin. They're also suspicious of Ahmadinejad's claim that he's dating Megan Fox." --Conan O'Brien

"Have you folks been following the Iranian elections? Well how about this Mahmoud Ahmadinejad? You know, he won, he has won the election now. And people are angry, and they're demanding a recount. And as a matter of fact, the last unofficial account actually had Al Franken ahead. They've gone crazy." --David Letterman

"A lot of turmoil in Iran right now over the recent presidential election. People protesting the election results have been avoiding the government media crackdown by posting messages on Twitter. The tweets declare that Ahmadinejad stole the election and that Jabeer is enjoying a lamb kabob." --Conan O'Brien

"How many of you folks are following the elections in Iran? Hard not to. It's compelling. Well, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was re-elected and won by a landslide, ladies and gentlemen. And I, you know, I guess the voters couldn't resist his good looks and charisma." --David Letterman

"But there were problems with the ballots in the Iranian election. And who would have thought that? There was a mistake. Thousands of Iranians ended up voting for Pat Buchanan." --David Letterman

"But I hope they get this figured out. I hope it goes away soon, because the last thing we need is unrest in the Middle East." --David Letterman

"But the guy, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, he's very happy that he won. He was up all night shooting nuclear missiles into the air." --David Letterman

~Compiled by Daniel Kurtzman