When you send out invitations, be as clear as possible on who is invited. You may want only the person whose name is on the invitation to attend, or you might expect the person to bring someone. State your preference on the invitation and clarify when the person sends or calls with an RSVP. That will prevent embarrassment later. However, that still doesn’t guarantee that you won’t wind up with more guests than you intended to have.

If you do frequent entertaining, you are bound to face the uninvited guest. This is a challenge at best, but it doesn’t have to throw you completely off. The main thing to remember is to stay calm and be gracious. One of the invited guests may have out-of-town visitors that she failed to tell you about. This may be awkward, but it isn’t the time to embarrass anyone.

Greet Everyone With a Smile

As your guests arrive, make sure you are smiling and offering a friendly greeting. When the uninvited guest shows up, there is no need to act upset or anything less than pleasant. You want your get-together to be fun for everyone, so make the most of the situation. Introduce the guest to the others.

Act Quickly

Before the uninvited guest notices he or she wasn’t expected, quickly make an adjustment to the refreshments or menu. This may require rinsing an extra beverage glass or piece of stemware. This generally isn’t a problem if the party is informal, but a formal dinner can be awkward if you already have the table set.

Apologize to your guests for not being finished with the setup. Hopefully, your table is big enough to accommodate an extra place setting. If not, have your significant other set up a card table or move a smaller table close to the main table. Remove two or three of the place settings from the table and place them on the extra table, along with a place setting for the extra person.

If you planned on serving chicken, steak, or fish fillets, you might consider slicing them and arranging them on a platter to make them stretch. You can add an extra cup of rice, microwave another potato, and toss a few more greens into the salad bowl. If you are serving pie or cake for dessert, cut smaller pieces.

If the Guest is Someone You Don’t Want at Your Party

There are some people you may not want at your party, which is why you didn't invite them in the first place. As you make your guest list, consider the reasons you have chosen to leave someone off. Let those who are invited know that this is an invitation-only party, and you are limited on space.

Ask your invited guests not to discuss it with others. This type of scenario is likely to happen in an office, club, or school environment. You don’t want to hurt the feelings of those you aren’t inviting, and you certainly don’t want to make them mad.

Even after carefully wording your invitations and letting the invited guests know that you are limiting your invitations, someone you didn’t invite may still show up. Unless the person poses a threat or is confrontational, be gracious and welcome him or her to your party. You don’t have to mention the lack of invitation.

There may be times when you don’t invite someone due to a personality clash with one of your other guests. Rather than turn the person away at the door, lead him or her to someone else, make an introduction, and try to get a pleasant conversation started.

Confrontation

If the uninvited person confronts you and asks why she never received an invitation, keep your explanation simple and brief. You may say that it was an oversight, you had limited resources, or you thought she had other plans and couldn’t attend. Then ask the person to stay and avoid discussing it again. Now your job is to be a gracious host or hostess and make sure everyone has a nice time.

Be Prepared

In the future, plan ahead for an extra guest. Add a place setting that can quickly be removed before the guests are seated. Have more than enough food that you can send home with guests or use as leftovers later.