How to Discipline Teens Without Pushing Them To Rebel
There are explanations for bad behaviours in teens. While they grow and become more able to do so many things on their own, they are still lacking in emotional maturity which is necessary to make good decisions.
At this stage, the parts in the brain that control decision-making have not yet completely developed. If independence is combined with immaturity, results will be poor and risky decisions such as involving in illegal drugs, smoking, drinking, and premarital sex.
Parents want their children to follow correct paths in life, however disciplining teens is very tough. When they argue with you, you cannot just persuade them to change their views or just divert their attention like what you did when they were little.
You have to adjust your parenting strategies when dealing with teens with behavioural problems. Aim to have more control over your teens without being too domineering. Here are some great ideas that can strengthen your parenting efficiency.
1. Set clear rules.
Teens tend to go beyond limitations in almost everything. Sometimes, they do so to see how their parents would react. So, it is imperative that you set clear rules and have reward and punishment for not observing the rules. Make sure that when you set the rules and punishments, they agree at some point so they would be willing to accept the consequences of their actions. Just remember that you as the parent still have the final say.
2. Put your rules into black and white.
Writing house rules will reduce misunderstandings. You can write them in a contract form and have your teens sign it. Then post the list or contract on the fridge or any spot your children will see often. Posting it will remind them of the rules they have agreed on.
3. Be firm and consistent with the rules.
Teens tend to negotiate and manipulate. They are very keen in spotting your flaws and weaknesses. When you become inconsistent and give in to their appeals, they will expect the same from you whenever they break any rule. Being consistent in disciplining teens likewise means both mom and dad have to be saying the same thing. If the mom says NO but the dad says YES, your kid knows very well who he would ask. While you are trying your best to be firm and consistent, learn to understand and be fair. A tad of compassion will be greatly rewarding as you discipline your teens.
4. Be a good example for them.
Being a parent does not exempt you from obeying house rules; the more you are expected to observe them because your kids should be looking up to you. So be a good role model for them.
5. Be and stay involved.
One of the most ideal ways to avoid bad behavioural problems in teens is to simply know what are happening in their lives. You do not have to spy on them, otherwise they will get annoyed. Be involved without meddling too much. Be genuinely interested in their daily activities. Ask them about their activities when they go out with their pals. Know their whereabouts and who they are with. But, if worse things become worst, consider seeking the help of a teenage psychologist.
At this stage, the parts in the brain that control decision-making have not yet completely developed. If independence is combined with immaturity, results will be poor and risky decisions such as involving in illegal drugs, smoking, drinking, and premarital sex.
Parents want their children to follow correct paths in life, however disciplining teens is very tough. When they argue with you, you cannot just persuade them to change their views or just divert their attention like what you did when they were little.
You have to adjust your parenting strategies when dealing with teens with behavioural problems. Aim to have more control over your teens without being too domineering. Here are some great ideas that can strengthen your parenting efficiency.
1. Set clear rules.
Teens tend to go beyond limitations in almost everything. Sometimes, they do so to see how their parents would react. So, it is imperative that you set clear rules and have reward and punishment for not observing the rules. Make sure that when you set the rules and punishments, they agree at some point so they would be willing to accept the consequences of their actions. Just remember that you as the parent still have the final say.
2. Put your rules into black and white.
Writing house rules will reduce misunderstandings. You can write them in a contract form and have your teens sign it. Then post the list or contract on the fridge or any spot your children will see often. Posting it will remind them of the rules they have agreed on.
3. Be firm and consistent with the rules.
Teens tend to negotiate and manipulate. They are very keen in spotting your flaws and weaknesses. When you become inconsistent and give in to their appeals, they will expect the same from you whenever they break any rule. Being consistent in disciplining teens likewise means both mom and dad have to be saying the same thing. If the mom says NO but the dad says YES, your kid knows very well who he would ask. While you are trying your best to be firm and consistent, learn to understand and be fair. A tad of compassion will be greatly rewarding as you discipline your teens.
4. Be a good example for them.
Being a parent does not exempt you from obeying house rules; the more you are expected to observe them because your kids should be looking up to you. So be a good role model for them.
5. Be and stay involved.
One of the most ideal ways to avoid bad behavioural problems in teens is to simply know what are happening in their lives. You do not have to spy on them, otherwise they will get annoyed. Be involved without meddling too much. Be genuinely interested in their daily activities. Ask them about their activities when they go out with their pals. Know their whereabouts and who they are with. But, if worse things become worst, consider seeking the help of a teenage psychologist.
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