Risks of Being a Surrogate Mother

• Much has changed since lawyer Noel Keane of Dearborn, Michigan drew up the first formal contract between a surrogate mother and a consenting married couple in the 1976. Since then, more than 22,000 babies have been born through surrogacy, surrogate mother centers across the United States have opened, tons of blogs have been started and there is even a surrogate mother newsletter. What's drawing all these people to surrogacy? Most commonly, the desire to have children from couples who cannot conceive naturally. And the surrogates are many times involved for the same altruistic reasons like wanting to help accomplish a couple's dream of parenthood. But the medical, psychological, emotional, financial and legal risks of being a surrogate mother are still very real and should be seriously considered before entering the process.
  
  

Medical

• "Never forget that pregnancy is dangerous all by itself, let alone an artificial one," states Karen Farmer, editor of Surrogate Motherhood website. "Complications can't always be avoided." It's important to keep medical risks associated with surrogate pregnancies like miscarriage, diabetes, ectopic pregnancies, thrombosis, high blood pressure hemorrhages and losing the ability to have children, at the forefront.
  
  

Psychological

• Losing control during pregnancy is one of the biggest psychological problems for surrogate mothers. The couple, claims Farmer's website, often will want to control what their surrogate eats, drinks and does, to ensure the well-being of their fetus. But surrogates, Farmer's site says, may feel the "my baby, my body" reaction, and think this adds too much restriction to their lives and bodies. Experienced surrogates who have had children before may also want to go through the pregnancy the way it has worked for them in the past. And, should medical issues arise, the question of who gets to decide what kind of treatment to pursue becomes problematic.
  
  The 1987 Baby M case, in which surrogate mother Mary Beth Whitehead unsuccessfully fought for custody of the child she carried, would scare anyone considering surrogacy. And surrogate moms agree that perhaps the hardest part about the process is relinquishing the baby at birth. Preparing for this, both mentally and emotionally before entering surrogacy, is imperative. Surrogate centers offer counseling and psychiatric help for this.
  
  

Financial

• Being financially stable is also a huge requirement for surrogate mothers. They are often times responsible for their own health care costs, including health insurance. Sometimes the couple covers these costs.
  
  

Legal

• Each state has different laws concerning surrogacy, and surrogacy is still illegal in some states, like New York, and heavily frowned upon in other states and by religious and social groups. But legal arrangements for those in states that allow surrogacy are assessed on an individual basis through contracts.
  
  Finding a surrogacy lawyer and drawing up a contract that meets the desires of the couple and the surrogate can be a challenge. To make this process easier, surrogate mom Andi Cohen writes that finding the best couple-surrogate match is key. Talk and ask questions to your couple before you enter into a relationship to avoid disagreements or legal wars during and after the pregnancy.
  
  Carrying a child for a couple can be extremely rewarding for the mind, body and spirit. Just make sure you are prepared.