How Do I Know It"s the Right Time to Get Pregnant Again After Miscarriage?
Updated February 06, 2013.
Question: How Do I Know It's the Right Time to Get Pregnant Again After Miscarriage?
I really want a baby but I am petrified about the notion of trying again. Should I just get over it? How do you know when it is the right time to get pregnant again?
Answer:
Depending on your individual situation and the circumstances of your miscarriage, it is probably fine to go ahead and try again for a new pregnancy as soon as you feel ready.
Yet, deciding whether you're emotionally ready isn't always easy. I think that emotional readiness is like a continuum with two extremes, with one end being eagerness to get pregnant again ASAP and the other being unwillingness to even think about a new pregnancy for fear of another miscarriage. Some people fall clearly on one end of that continuum or the other, and others fall somewhere in the middle.
Whatever your reaction is with regard to emotional readiness, it's probably normal. There is no right answer that applies to everyone in terms of deciding whether you are emotionally ready to try again, and it's a question that only you and your partner can answer.
Here are some points to consider when you assess your emotional readiness. Remember that the question of your physical readiness is something you should discuss with your doctor.
Sources:
After a Miscarriage: Getting Pregnant Again. American Pregnancy Association. Accessed: Oct. 6, 2009. http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancyloss/mcgettingpregnantagain.html.
Preparing for another pregnancy. The Miscarriage Association. Accessed: Oct. 6, 2009. http://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/ma2006/downloads/Preparing%20for%20another%20pregnancy.pdf
Question: How Do I Know It's the Right Time to Get Pregnant Again After Miscarriage?
I really want a baby but I am petrified about the notion of trying again. Should I just get over it? How do you know when it is the right time to get pregnant again?
Answer:
Depending on your individual situation and the circumstances of your miscarriage, it is probably fine to go ahead and try again for a new pregnancy as soon as you feel ready.
Yet, deciding whether you're emotionally ready isn't always easy. I think that emotional readiness is like a continuum with two extremes, with one end being eagerness to get pregnant again ASAP and the other being unwillingness to even think about a new pregnancy for fear of another miscarriage. Some people fall clearly on one end of that continuum or the other, and others fall somewhere in the middle.
Whatever your reaction is with regard to emotional readiness, it's probably normal. There is no right answer that applies to everyone in terms of deciding whether you are emotionally ready to try again, and it's a question that only you and your partner can answer.
Here are some points to consider when you assess your emotional readiness. Remember that the question of your physical readiness is something you should discuss with your doctor.
- Will trying again right now make it easier or harder to cope?
If you feel like you can answer this question one way or the other, the answer of whether you're emotionally ready to try again may have the same answer. You may feel you cannot move on from the miscarriage until there is something to move toward, such focusing on trying to have a baby. Or you might decide the moving on and coping needs to come first before you can consider trying for a new baby. Everyone is different.
- Do you feel like your feelings are manageable?
You don't have to feel like you are "over" the miscarriage, but if you are still feeling completely overwhelmed to the point that it is affecting your daily life, there is a chance that you are suffering from clinical depression as a result of your miscarriage. It may be wise to talk to a doctor or counselor before you get pregnant again. Don't assume that a new pregnancy will make strong feelings go away. - Are you in agreement with your partner on what to do?
Whether you're trying again right now or waiting, you and your partner should agree on what you are going to do. If you don't agree, you may end up with one or both partners resenting one another. Don't be afraid to seek counseling to work through your feelings if you're not on the same page with your partner about trying again. - Do you have a good support network?
When you do get pregnant again, chances are you may feel differently about the experience of being pregnant. Things may feel a little scarier and your joy might be dampened by your past experiences, and feelings about your miscarriage may come back during your pregnancy. It's a good idea to have people you can lean on, such as supportive friends and relatives and a doctor or midwife that you trust. Joining an in-person or online support group for pregnancy after miscarriage (such as the forums on this site) may be helpful as well.
Sources:
After a Miscarriage: Getting Pregnant Again. American Pregnancy Association. Accessed: Oct. 6, 2009. http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancyloss/mcgettingpregnantagain.html.
Preparing for another pregnancy. The Miscarriage Association. Accessed: Oct. 6, 2009. http://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/ma2006/downloads/Preparing%20for%20another%20pregnancy.pdf
Source...