America has a number of racial problems, but the one between the white and black communities should have been resolved long ago.
Granted, the Civil Rights Act, and the leadership of Dr.
King took us a long way but recent events in Ferguson, Missouri makes one wonder if any real progress has been made.
People on both sides of the issue seem to be talking at each other but hardly ever with each other.
And maybe that's a major part of the problem.
This may sound a little strange, but once a problem has been identified it is no longer a problem, the problem then becomes how to find a solution.
Since many solutions to large problems start in rather a small way, I have one to offer.
It could even start in Ferguson, Missouri.
I once lived in an upscale area and my next door neighbors were a black family.
The husband worked for IBM and was very successful.
We said hello to each other, borrowed tools, shared coffee during the aftermath of a hurricane, and got along just fine.
The interesting thing was that he entertained a lot and not once did I see a white face during any of his many outdoor cookouts.
On the other hand, in our infrequent social gatherings, he could say the same thing about there not being any blacks at our parties.
We didn't think that was unusual and neither did he.
Not one single human being has ever been born with a prejudice.
Prejudice must be conceived and nurtured, and if it becomes ingrained enough, it evolves into hate.
Most prejudices start with a perception, one which is hardly ever grounded in reality.
A person perceives another person, makes a judgment usually not based on facts, or false facts, and, given enough time, that perception becomes a reality in that person's life.
So the starting point to progress seems to require that we attempt to change our perceptions.
First, if perceptions are going to be changed let's get rid of a few misconceptions.
For starters, white people commit more crimes in America than blacks do.
If you think about it, there are many more whites than blacks so it stands to reason that statistic would be true.
Second, there are more white families on welfare than there are blacks for the same reason.
Third, black misbehavior is not a cultural problem.
Although there are distinct differences between black and white cultures it has nothing to do with crime, or welfare, or a lack of ambition.
And certainly nothing to do with innate intelligence.
For instance, as a little child, if you were made keenly aware of the fact that you were less desirable than your white schoolmates, if you recognized that you were receiving negative looks from white people, that you were silently being shunned in many instances, and as you were growing older this negative behavior became the norm, I think your perception of society would change and you would seek solace from people that look and thought like you.
And then, as you became an adult, the real ugliness of prejudice would come into play when job opportunities became scarce and any hope for a decent future became dim.
If you're a black teenager, you either decide to fight for a better future or you don't.
If you don't you are simply raising the white flag and surrendering to the evils of prejudice.
There are many positive aspects of black culture: their food, sense of humor, their churches, and most certainly the choirs within those churches, their sense of family and most important, their courage to continue in the face of unbelievable adversity, adversity white people can only imagine but never experience.
However, when it comes down to simple day to day living, the fact is that most black families are no different than their white counterparts.
But how does a white family or a black family know that? The answer is they don't.
But maybe if they shared some time together they might begin to realize the difference is small, maybe even non-existent.
And then maybe perceptions would change.
Looking at the progress, or lack thereof, that stemmed from the civil rights movement it occurred to me that perhaps the South had it a little right.
Perhaps black people weren't interested in being integrated into the white world; they simply wanted the playing field to become equal.
Separate but equal.
They wanted nice, middle class housing, in a safe neighborhood and good schools for their children and they really didn't care if the classes were all black, all white or mixed.
They wanted the same opportunity at a good job that whites enjoyed and really didn't want it if it were forced through quotas or the machinations of the federal bureaucracy.
I don't pretend to speak for the black community but perhaps they just wanted to be treated like everyone else.
My proposal is to start a small pilot program where selected black and white families share dinners together.
Each family would host a dinner, show off their family recipes but most important, would ask questions and start a dialogue with each other about their family backgrounds, their views on various subjects and answer any questions the other family might have.
Some dinners would include families with children, others just couples with a variety of ages in each.
This is not an "eat and run" proposal but would include sitting around the living room just talking to each other.
One of the subjects to be discussed would be the sharing of the problems each family faced.
That part of the discussion might turn out to be very interesting, and certainly enlightening.
I would suggest an initial group of 20 families with follow- -up interviews to gauge the reaction from both sides.
Maybe we would learn something and maybe not, but getting people from different races to talk to each other, in a friendly and neutral setting might produce some surprising results.
The example I used in the beginning about my neighbor and I is a case in point.
We didn't need to interact socially; we were just two friends that happened to live next door to each other.
The nice thing about this idea is that it doesn't really cost a lot to implement.