More times than not, it has to do with the things we're doing rather than the things we're not doing that continue to stand in the way of saving your marriage.
But, how do you know if you're doing anything wrong? Nobody's ever told you and the only way you eventually figure it out is by recognizing that what you're doing just isn't working.
While that's fine to eventually recognize that you're doing things wrong, how much more are you willing to risk by doing all the wrong things and waiting to figure out if it's working or not? Not any longer I assume, so here are some reasons why you'll continue to struggle.
Learn them and avoid them as much as you can.
One of the first things that stands in the way of saving your marriage is how you're handling and dealing with the news that your spouse would like to end the marriage.
Although this news is and can be emotionally crippling for some if not all of us, it's very important and critical the way in which you handle it.
Even though this news has made you feel all kinds of things on the inside, anger, hurt, confusion, panic, frustration just for starters, try to remain in control the best you can.
Do not let these feelings dictate how you are handling and dealing with your daily life and your discussions about the marriage.
Being in control will both help you to cope on the inside and serve your best interest in handling the steps you need to take to save your marriage.
The next thing that can really hinder your efforts is being very pushy and head strong with your spouse during this time.
Your natural reaction is to stay on top of this issue and dig up and out anything and everything you can from your spouse that will both help you to understand why they want to end the marriage and what you can do to save it.
While it's important to find out these things of course, it's even more important at a time like this that you respect your spouses need for some space and time to sort this out as well.
If all you continue to do is badger and dig at them about the marriage, you can actually drive them to leave sooner.
There's a fine line here that should be carefully considered so that you're not just pushing your spouse away or driving more space between the both of you by being overbearing.
There are many other things that potentially stand in the way of saving your marriage.
I've just touched on a couple of the most potentially damaging or hindering.
There's no sense in making huge leaps of progress in your marriage, if it still bares the chance of falling back apart by not knowing all the things you should avoid doing in the process.
While it's important to learn what is needed to save your marriage, including the steps to do so, it's equally important to learn all you can about what will keep you or stop you from saving it as well.