Trouble in Paradise In the beginning of almost all marriages the relationship is exciting.
There is a shared sense of starting an all new chapter of life together.
Dreams of a bright future and feelings of love help a newly married couple have high hopes for a close and intimate marriage.
Soon enough those feelings of love are put to the test when the honeymoon period comes to a close.
Time marches on relentlessly in a couple's relationship, and with it life situations can change drastically.
Over the course of a marriage relationship, so many things can change from the time that the marriage was brand-new.
Feelings about each other can alter.
Also, work-stress situations can become increasingly harder to handle.
Additionally, financial worries, and the stress of child rearing can alter the dynamics of a relationship dramatically.
These changes can cycle back and forth or erratically within a marriage.
The stress of all of these situations, when combined together, can put a marriage into a state of crisis.
In all actuality, this is quite a normal part of life that a majority of married couples experience at one time or another.
The following tips will help guide you through some of the relational aspects involved in having an intimate marriage.
Also, these tips will give advice on how to accomplish that goal.
Be Honest with Each Other Remember, there are ways to manage stress, scale back the responsibilities in life, and create a more harmonious relationship with others, especially one's spouse.
But, the big question is how to accomplish these positive goals.
A greater question still is how to bring it all together to have an intimate marriage with your spouse.
To love one's spouse is a conscious decision -- made from situation to situation.
However, it is important to communicate with your partner your level of feeling of love for her or him.
Also, tell your partner how you feel about these stressful situations, and tell him or her if those stressful situations make you feel more distant.
This type of communication in marriage should be shared by and between the two partners in the marriage.
Next, both marriage partners need to move on to the next phase of cultivating intimacy in the marriage together.
Understand the Full Meaning of Intimacy The word intimacy often has a sexual connotation as fostered by the media or in the vernacular of our popular culture.
However, the full meaning of the word "intimate" from dictionary.
com is, "associated in close personal relations: an intimate friend", "characterized by or involving warm friendship or a personally close or familiar association or feeling: an intimate greeting", and "very private; closely personal: one's intimate affairs" http://dictionary.
reference.
com/browse/intimate.
The key to understanding the full meaning of marital intimacy is that the marriage must involve the quality of each partner personally caring for the other person.
In a healthy relationship this quality is mutually shared among the marriage partners.
A passionate marriage is an intimate marriage, built on love, closeness and friendship.
The full meaning of intimacy is the quality of personal caring and sharing in a relationship.
Make a List of the Root Causes of Marriage Troubles If resentment and anger are "hitting a boiling point" during your communication with your spouse, then take a time-out, in order to cool off, with an agreed upon plan to continue the conversation when you both have a more level head.
At such time, quietly make a list together of all of the stresses, hurts, and frustrations each of you have felt.
Determine together which problems are the root issues and which are more tangential problems caused by the root issues.
Make a list of the root causes and work together to find some degree of a solution to those root issues.
This can become extensive.
It works best when each of you resolves to care about and help heal the root cause of the other partner's resentment or relationship apathy.
Learn and grow together through this process.
Allow the process to become a relationship and trust builder for your marriage.
Acquire the Mindset of Successful Intimacy Shared By Marriage Partners One thing that successful marriages have in common is the attitude of partnership, unity, and agreement to go through these difficulties in a close and supportive manner.
The attitude of resolving to pull-together is an attitude found in successful marriages.
Difficult times can be an opportunity to pull-together and create an atmosphere of victory, or difficult times can become a way of drifting apart in defeat.
It is important to mutually choose to pull-together through active communication, instead of drifting apart when the going gets tough.
At the alter, the two marriage partners only have each other and a promise to love, honor, and cherish each other through "good times and bad times" alike.
Carrying that resolve on into the daily situations of married life creates the resolution needed to succeed, no matter what good or bad things present themselves.
That resolve can be restored along with the marriage relationship if root issues are dealt with in an environment of caring for and helping each other.
Resolving the root issues of the problems in the marriage can eliminate those problems that have stemmed from the root issues.
And, resolving root issues creates relief from the emotional onslaught those root issues have caused.
Conclusion No marriage is perfect.
When troubles and the inevitable cooling down of the relationship occur, follow these steps to regain a marriage of lasting intimacy: Honestly open up to each other about your individual feelings, deliberately decide to love and care for the other partner on a day-to-day basis, and make a list of the root causes to the lack of intimacy together in order to be able to pull together for a victorious marriage using a positive mindset.
These steps are the keys to regaining the love, admiration and affection for each other that brought you to your honeymoon.
Furthermore, they will see you through the ups and downs of married life together.