My Chinese wife and I have been married for nearly fifteen years now; enough time to discover one another's dislikes and likes, strengths and weaknesses and, certainly, the aspects of cross-racial miscommunication which lead to the most fights in our household plans and everyday lifestyle.

Normally, due to the duration of our union, I usually get asked questions by close friends and acquaintances about how mixed-race marriages like ours survive when others between 2 different people of the same race appear to be forever deteriorating.

Seriously, I do not have a simple answer; but, some views that instantly pop into my head include:

At the end of the day, Chinese wives are girls (yes€¦, yes, I understand that's obvious) who want to be treated like€¦, well, women. Yet, possibly in mix cultural weddings both parties try that a bit harder, go that one step further for one another as, deep down, both are aware that, regardless how well they get on, there'll always be communication breaks and cultural misunderstandings-yet most of which can be settled with a smile and hug!

One more valid point which appears to show up regularly (as I have learned this from some close friends who have also married Chinese women) is the truth that a lot of Chinese wives feel less restricted by a marriage to a foreigner-both in terms of what they're able to do both culturally and in their new, extended family, and also from a competent career standpoint. Foreigners are, perhaps, generally more liberal with regards to women's rights and professions, and can normally aid enhance the very best in their wives.

From a different standpoint, a counter point to this is a lot of foreign people really admire the tenaciousness, strength and resolve of Chinese women when it comes to concerns of family members, or their business expertise; the old adage of Chinese ladies being like one of those traditional sweets which had a €soft outside and a hard centre€ still has an interest for several men from overseas hunting for a Chinese wife.

Then, we could also think about the question of, hay can I call it, €honour€ where, most likely the Chinese woman wishes to prove to her close friends that she can make a matrimony to a foreigner work (who knows, she may have married him against the wishes of her friends and family); similarly, from the perspective of the foreign man, if he has been through all the issues to relocate to a foreign country and locate and marry a lady from a different community, he too likes to show his family and friends which he can make the relationship work for the long run.

Naturally, it €takes 2 to tango€ as another old expression goes and there has to be €give and take€, love and understanding from each party if you're in for the extended haul€¦